The city is Ashburton, the venue is The Shed.

The stage is set.

The mic is working.

The audience starts to filter in. The beer has been poured. The crowd builds to around 60 or so people, seats seem pretty much full.  The gig is called Simon & Barry – The Original Comedy Assasins, or Asses. Here is the ad –

This is my first ever stand up gig, I have never ever bothered trying before. Simon and I both had two six-minute sets, which doesn’t seem that long but believe me it is! 12 minutes of material is heaps, especially when considering on the likes of Comedy Central they have around 3-minute sets. In saying that we recently went to a gig in Christchurch where they did 30-minute sets…but back to a more favourable comparison the likes of Jerry Seinfeld started with 5-minute sets.

Simon messages me before Christmas last year and suggests I do the gig with him and lists of the positive reason’s why I should. After a lot of thought and some gentle persuasion, I accept the offer.

Throughout Christmas, I thought about it, forever lingering in the back of my mind. The day continued to draw closer and closer and the nerves continued to build in anticipation.

The original gig was meant to be February 24th, 2011, two days after the quake. Needless to say, it was canceled, and to be honest it was a weight off my shoulders, in one way I thought it was all over and done with. However it was not, it was penciled in for May…soon that was postponed to June. I crossed my fingers for another postponement but that never happened.

I am not sure why life seems to work this way but isn’t it just typical that when something is important and requires your attention, other things seem to try to steal it away. On the day of the gig I felt less than prepared…trying to go over it in my head all the time, asking myself the question.. is this actually funny?

There have been times in previous performances on stage when things went bad, when the jokes weren’t funny, when no-one actually laughed and there was the odd uncomfortable coughing going on…it was so awkward that I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me, I walked off stage so embarrassed. I was not sure i could handle another performance like that, but the fact it was in Ashburton helped.

Si and I drove down together, that was the best thing and actually made the trip even more fun. Bouncing ideas and thoughts of each other, drinking energy drinks and discussing evolution and science. No that’s not true, we never discussed evolution.

So we make it down, get to the gig, meet the owner, talk through the set, check the mic and grab a beer…we disappear into the green room. The green room is not green, its the storage area out the back but it does the trick. A few of our mates from Christchurch made the trip, Matt Kitto, Nadia Reid, and Sarah Kirner and we were pleased to have their support.

Showtime comes faster than expected before we know it Si is about to go on. I find a spot in the corner, side of the stage to watch. Si had a tough start, the crowd were still a bit cold and just as he got started there was aloud distraction. But he pulled it together and went for it, he had some great moments, his impersonation of Arnold Schwarzenegger was awesome.

A quick break and then it was my turn. ” Please welcome to the stage…Barry Jackson! “, a polite clap. Protruding fake confidence from years of acting training I went for it, pausing for the moments when I thought people would laugh, and I was happy to find they actually did.

With one set under the belt, I relaxed a little…it went well and I didn’t die, people laughed at the right spots.

Si attacks his second set and once again was hindered by random distractions beyond his control, but to his credit and a true sign of professionalism he continued on. A true storyteller, he finishes strong. Then I get the call for the final set.

The last 6 minutes.

I am happy to report that I didn’t die that time either, it went smooth and once again people laughed at the right spots. When I walked off the stage that time I was stoked, the feeling of accomplishment and success overwhelmed me. I had conquered something I hadn’t done before, not always glamorously, but conquered as in I gave it a go and passed. I ‘knocked the bastard off’ so to speak.

The owner seemed happy, must be because we are booked in for the 30th of June now.

And so the cycle begins again, in the back corner of my mind I am taking note of everything that goes on around me and asking the question…’ is that funny?’

The only difference this time is I have a better idea of what is ahead of me and the knowledge that greatness always has a beginning, haha. Being a Stand Up comic may not be my thing, but you never know, it has to start somewhere. Why not at The Shed in a town called Ashburton.

B.